cant make it up!!!!

well. well well. so here goes, open your eyes wide and sit down -  Im almost back to square one. And all because of a HUG! Im re-broken it seems........back on the tramadol. pain levels back at 9 out of 10, nosleep last night, couldnt turn over, ice packed my ribs and then hot/cold treatment all day. some fresh air in the country and lovely friends looking after me -  thanks Louise and Bob, what a relief you were there........

I was out for the first time in a long time on Friday night seeing a friends private view in memoriam of his wonderful work - artist Max Lowry who died very suddenly almost a year ago on the eve of his wedding to gorgeous Jane from sudden arryhythmic death syndrome. (

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2011/sep/05/sudden-arrhythmic-death-syndrome

)
There were all his wonderful friends and family there and the event was simlpy stunning and raising a huge amount of money for the charity CRY. Enjoying catching up and seeing a great group of people. By the end of a lovely evening with them and reminiscing about MAx it came to goodbyes. A few people gave me gentle but lovely hugs, I thought nothing of it. but it seems there can be one slight squeeze too far when you ahve healing bones and osteoporisis! I felt them pop and crack and I took a sharp intake of breath. My friend felt it too and said some to the effect of 'Christ what was that'. I prayed with all my hope that it wasnt as bad as I suspected. but as the weekend has progressed the pain has intensified despite lying pretty much flat and sleep has eluded me.

In short Im devastated after finally making some progress. Im sore and stiff and back in painville! and I was just getting stronger and fitter. its SOOOOOOOO unfair  -  thats just the way I feel. sorry but feeling slight self centred and pityfull and whatnot.......Im gutted.  And its aboslutely no ones fault.. its just the way this thing is, but my god Im going to chase this down with the doctors and specialists. So GP tomorrow and hopefully a new set of ultrasound scans and then specialist on Tuesday.

this totally takes the biscuit, but its life for me right now. I dont want to stop touching people or runing away from things, and I cant believe that such a brief moment come cause such rubbish. I wasnt at work, I wasnt doing anything crazy, I wasnt drunk, I was being careful and for the first time in months letting my hair down a little bit cos I was feeling better and a wee bit stronger and celebrating Max, his art and 2.5 days back at work -  small miracles..........ho hum.......

it was a nice hug all the same!